When you start writing, you probably come to it with a lot of preconceived ideas about what writing life will be like. And then you start writing for real and realise you may have been wrong about a few things. This post is a humorous look at expectation versus reality of writing life.
Writing spot
Expectation
Reality
“I’ll have a room just for me, full of books, with a desk and a view, maybe an armchair…”
“I have a laptop, a smidge of clear space on the sofa, and ten minutes – let’s do this.”
Research
Expectation
Reality
“I’ll put together a comprehensive list of things to research and wiz through it, no worries.”
“So that was the biggest earthquake…and that’s how killer whales hunt…hang on, I wonder how you make a cape…”
First draft
Expectation
Reality
“All first drafts are bad, it’s just me getting my ideas down. Everything can be fixed.”
“It sucks, I suck, words suck – ah I’ll just skip this bit and come back to it. And this bit. And this.”
Editing
Expectation
Reality
“Here’s where the magic happens. I’ve got good bones, so things can only get better!”
“Why is Larry now named Steve? I can’t have them meet in Paris when she’s still in Sao Paulo! None of this makes any sense.”
Synopsis
Expectation
Reality
“It’s just a simple, clear breakdown of my story – easy.”
“This. Is. Hell.”
Reading
Expectation
Reality
“Reading is essential to being a writer. It will help me learn how to improve – and I enjoy it!”
“This is God tier. I’m never going to be this good. I should just give up now. Also I would die for this book.”
And finally
Expectation
Reality
“I’ve got the cover design, the blurb, the tagline, and the cast for the film adaptation all worked out.”
“What do you mean I have to actually write the book first??”
😀 😀 – – Me? I read/research/surf – and THEN a bookmark, a picture of the book section, a link is saved – in ‘research notes’ file for ‘To Write” with lil synopsis card, or short outline, to display my ‘thoughts on the matter’ that ‘someday’ I’ll write about – – – Sigh – Which means massive clean up of ‘To Write’ file, often – because often? I read over and think, “Did I write this out, while drunk?? Why was that important?? What the heck does that heading in the outline mean/refer to???” –
Delete, Delete, Delete – AH-HA! Yes, I must write about this one – it has survived 5 years, 2 computer/external hard drive backup failures – thus, THIS should be written/edited etc. – cuz doesn’t that lil ole thingee come up, over and over and over – – ??? 😀
18/07/2022 at 6:11 PM
😀 😀 – – Me? I read/research/surf – and THEN a bookmark, a picture of the book section, a link is saved – in ‘research notes’ file for ‘To Write” with lil synopsis card, or short outline, to display my ‘thoughts on the matter’ that ‘someday’ I’ll write about – – – Sigh – Which means massive clean up of ‘To Write’ file, often – because often? I read over and think, “Did I write this out, while drunk?? Why was that important?? What the heck does that heading in the outline mean/refer to???” –
Delete, Delete, Delete – AH-HA! Yes, I must write about this one – it has survived 5 years, 2 computer/external hard drive backup failures – thus, THIS should be written/edited etc. – cuz doesn’t that lil ole thingee come up, over and over and over – – ??? 😀
01/08/2022 at 12:33 AM
Get out of my head! 😀 😀 😀
You nailed it! Absolutely priceless!
23/08/2022 at 3:24 PM
😄 – we’ve all been there, done that, fabricated the t-shirt!